Mike: Marlon Byrd is going to be really bad.
Jimmy: But it will take 400 ABs for Terry Collins to notice.
Jimmy: Shorter lines at the Shake Shack!
Mike: No, longer ones, it is the only reason people are at the park.
Jimmy: Somebody, somewhere, will longingly refer to “The Cecchini Era.”
Mike: David Wright will be a true All Star.
Jimmy: Sean Marcum’s arm will explode.
Mike: Ike Davis becomes a legitimate middle of the order hitter.
Jimmy: In future psychological tests, when therapists mention the name “Ike Davis,” Mets fans will immediately answer, “Walked and stranded on first!”
Jimmy: Um, Mike, I think that’s already happened. Royals GM, Dayton Moore, will accuse Sandy Alderson of plagerizing his “plan.”
Mike: Lucas Duda will not hit. It hurts me to type this one.
Jimmy: Lucas Duda will run into a wall. But do not fear, the wall will be in his own bathroom. He’s a little klutzy that way. Out two weeks, those towel hangers hurt.
Mike: Bobby Parnell has a big year.
Jimmy: Jordany Valdespin will get three hits in a game, including a HR, and sit the next day.
Jimmy: Terry Collins will put out a “gag lineup” with Jay Horowitz in RF. Not everyone will find that hysterical.
Mike: Matt Harvey is the most fun at the ballpark all year.
Jimmy: No, Zack Wheeler will electrify Ciit Field at times. He won’t be perfect, he won’t be ready, but he’ll be dominant.
Mike: Travis d’Arnaud comes up and is not a “difference maker,” as it is too late to make any difference.
Jimmy: Poor Reese Havens will make it to a MLB roster by the end of the year, in a different uniform.
Mike: John Buck is traded for a player to be named later and $11,000.
Jimmy: SNY analyst Bobby Valentine is going to piss somebody off. Too easy?
Jimmy: The Mets crack medical staff puts him in a walking boot for four months, due to a mix-up with the files.
Mike: Aarron Laffey doesn’t make anyone forget Pat Misch.
Jimmy: Terry Collins will leave in Greg Burke for an inning too long — eight times this season.
Jimmy: Keith Hernandez will comment about the Mets right fielder playing awfully shallow, only to be corrected by Ron Darling who points out that it’s Daniel Murphy playing awfully deep.
Mike: Every Mets fan under 50 will continue to wonder which team Archie Bell played with.
Jimmy: The Mets will wear 37 different uniform jerseys, and 16 hat variations, and I won’t give a crap one way or the other. This isn’t Project Runway.
Mike: Over 70 wins baby! 71.
Jimmy: Not quite, Mike, 67 — this isn’t spring training anymore, we only play Houston 6 times. But more to the point, something will go wrong, because something always does, and the paper-thin Mets won’t have the reinforcements down on the farm.
OKAY, READERS, HOW ABOUT YOU? How many wins for the 2013 Mets? Be the first to get the correct number and win some crap from Mike’s basement!!!